I have been thinking a lot lately about one year ago - at this time a year ago, we had been through the most difficult of the ultrasounds in which we were given so many scary possibilities - that was June 2009. We had been through the MRI and met with the neurosurgeon - that was the end of August 2009. And then we turned our focus on trying not to worry and just preparing for L*ily to come. As I watched a coworker go through a "normal pregnancy" this summer, I re-lived the "fun" stuff about a normal pregnancy - I actually even missed some of it. You know the swollen ankles, the swollen belly, the sleepless nights (which I still have some of now!), the moving belly, the talk about labor and delivery, drugs or no drugs, hospitals - this one can really take me right back there, all I have to do is close my eyes and I'm there. It has been so interesting because while I re-live this, L*ily keeps changing and changing. She now sits like she has known how for so long (I guess 6 weeks is long when you are less than a year), and while still so sweet she has also moved into being quite coy lately. Tonight despite my ongoing efforts to teach her a nice, gentle sign for "more" she just banged on her tray... Loudly! She has a great deal to say - lots of dadadadadadadada. And while she has loved Z for a long time, she lights up in a new way when she sees her now. She is a gazer - she grabs you with her eyes and somehow "wills" you to look at her. She would win any staring contest. Z has become more fascinated with L too and is enjoying her company more as L responds so much to Z.
L is not crawling yet but can pull her tummy off the ground and rock and can also scoot backward from one end of the room to another. We had our first taste of grabbing toys the other day when Z stepped out of the room and L took Z's luvy - the worst thing to grab! So I'm sorry to be such an infrequent blogger but keeping up and soaking it all in and thinking it all through amidst the daily grind can be just about all I can do with my thoughts some days as I live. Oh what a crazy, ugly, emotional, beautiful ride this has been.
Oh and the neurosurgeon - we went back to see him for a follow up to L's 4 post-birth head ultrasounds to see if we need to keep checking in on her brain - this was at the recommendation of our pediatrician who said, "Go back to him so you can get his blessing and be done with this because I think you don't need to worry about this anymore." So, Dr. Neurosurgeon responded to that by literally "blessing" L*ily and then told us that many people function well with enlarged ventricles while many with normal ventricles don't (he said those are the people running our government!). We go see the pediatric cardiologist, audiologist, and ENT in October for check ups so I hope they know how to "bless" too. Like I said, crazy, ugly, emotional, beautiful ride.
